Coca-Cola Warmachine

The arbitrary rules of the medium.

Am I the only one who feels as though all my efforts have ever achieved were a) my survival and b) someone else's success? I would like to be successful. If it's true, I'm certainly not alone in being the back someone else has built their reputation on, even if I'm the only one who feels it (though I'm ceratinly not). Ho hum I feel oppressed by mediocrity, I'm not sure I am even able to conjecture an intelligent thesis. My work does not flow, or at least, I need to exert more effort to achieve flow in my work, so following true to my form I'll divert my attention to apples.

I like apples.

This is not a productive area of conversation.

Productive areas of conversation for me..

finding jobs in the music industry with a psych degree and an electronics diploma


new thoughts
I spent so much time playing with Crystal HA! My guitar knows all about it. The gym knows nothing about it and shows very little interest in my personal life any how.


Jeopardizing Privacy


As naturally social as humans are it seems to me as though our progress as a society is hampered by our fear of losing our privacy. In private we are completely anonymous, free to feel, think and do as we see fit without creating any threat to the social acceptance our public image brings us.

I wonder if the conception of an omnipotent God is not the only requirement in developing an individuals sense of morality. If I'm never alone I'll always be concerned with maintaining an image of acceptable behaviours in the eyes of God.

There is no God, no, not in the fundamental sense. The eyes of God are the eyes of onlookers, people who can see the consequence of our actions, even the subtle shame we conceal over the guilty pleasures we've had in secret.

The ideal is to find that unconditional love; a place where what you say, think, and feel is held to your credit. In such a place privacy is unecessary because you feel comfortable being who you are, as unique an individual as that is, in a public setting.

Misreadings

There seems to be a standard here in the Moncton Public Library. The city itself grows from the silty roots of its history. As I made my way to the post office on St. George street from the bus terminal, and then on to this library, here, on Main street, I noticed the construction dates set into some of the older brick buildings: the No. 2 fire station, the united church. I was surprised to see a group of individuals gathered around outside the door of the Karing Kitchen, a soup kitchen I had long forgotten, tucked around a quick corner. It jumped out at me. I was unsuspecting. I wove a course where at each cross-road I chose what I felt was the most attractive direction to take.

There's construction on Millenium boulevard. I thought to myself "That is the strategy: to, at a cross-roads, create a superior visual appeal that attracts attention. Traffic will surely follow."

It is an idea.

I've been thinking about this test I'm about to write. How could I not? I've been thinking about the job, and thinking about what my life might be like if I earned a decent living. Fantasizing really. When I came into the library I noticed a guy who had the outline of a star tattooed under his eye. I noticed his style and liked what he was wearing.

I stopped into Artsy et Vintage on my way to the library. I had this idea for a leather with a fur collar. There wasn't a lot of stock in the store, though some of the items looked pretty sharp. The hats she carries caught my eye. It led me to think of belts and sun glasses.

I'll be meeting with Gramma for supper. Hopefully she will be eager to face the challenge of driving in the cold rain.

My assessment begins in an hour.

I've been conceptualizing the content of the test. A general assessment of vocabulary and comprehension, word meanings and parsing semantic content from utterances. Thinking about the job I realised that I had been underestimating the cognitive load it must place on the worker. I had been so focused on keeping two planes from crashing into each other I had overlooked some of the other challenges. First, I had realised that although keeping two planes separated was a feat in itself, there are likely many planes to keep track of. I imagine the most complicated flow of traffic being monitored is between take off and landing. I wonder if controllers don't make course corrections due to inclimate weather. I do enjoy the geometry I picture with my minds eye, arches and spirals. I think the job likely involves the comparison of rates. Acceleration to hundreds of kilometeres per hour, ascension to eleventions of ten of thousands of feet, trajectories, descent, landing, decceleration. All in a days work.

There are a few instances I may consider:

1. Aircraft takes off from some runway n at airport x for duration t to arrive at destination y. The course is described arithmetically.

The same aircraft must land safely.

2. The aircraft lands at a) the same airport or b) a different airport or the aircraft remains in flight.

3. A second aircraft takes off from a) the same airport i. the same runway ii. a different runway b) a different airport.


It might be nice to have something to eat before I'm occupied by the assessment.

Do not underestimate the importance of teamwork. Looking into it I see there are many stations monitoring all of the different aspects of air traffic.

At 3am

Smooth Noise

I can listen to that later.

I was playing guitar a little while ago and while I played I was trying to sing. Choosing words to sing is the first step, and I think making an attempt to formulate words is a big step in becoming an expert though I haven't done much research on the subject. The next challenge is to fit the words into the rhythmic structure of the music and to sing them on pitch. The last step is to sing something interesting. I guess the last step ties all of the previous steps in together.

Draft Reversal

How did he write, all those things that he wrote?

Measuring productivity: an operational definition

Comparing the mean between two populations

Changing the mean

Managing Drab

First and second year BSc courses should place emphasis on the scientific method

Reassurance

A few reassuring things happened today, despite waking up with a splitting headache. I talked with Gramma, and Dr. MacLean liked a Zeppelin song I posted. These two things reassure me of some fundamental values I hold dear. I also heard back from a response I sent to an add on Craigslist, this reassured me of a few things: the legitimacy of Craigslist, and also my ability to spot opportunity.

A few things happened today that reassured me of some not so good stuff: playing games and studying for Chemistry mostly. I heard back from another lady who has a place, that was slightly reassuring. I work this weekend, that's kinda reassuring.

Initial Uptake

White Sand

Blue Ocean

Random Encounters

Atta boy, and a boy!

Crunch Time

Formating my head space over an hour of accents: 1 accent for every 16 beats at 104 beats per minute

this is how I do chemistry

Venting
What a huge upset. There's nothing worse than having your comfort taken from you.

An unbiased third party

Where am I?

It must be time to shower


It must be time to eat

I am at a cross-roads

AAHH GET ME OUTTA HERE!

Elitism

It hin
The more you blog, the less you

Fishing through corpses afloat on a river, the trident

Inviting men to go hunting, to murder them and take what's theirs

Taking your best friend out fishing, to lose him while you sex his girlfriend of which he is unaware

I have friends I do things with, don't I?

Elitism

Finding people interested in my 'thing'

Doing that thing I do

What is it I do?

Who is it I do it with?

The More You Blog

Today should be a fun day. I have to finish a paper for tomorrow. It wouldn't be so bad except my lower back is hurting me. I think I'll do some stretches.

Yoga is so important, I need find a way to incorporate it into my daily life.

The mosquitos are awake!

Impressive Feature

I never heard from her again.

Take a break.

Everybody in a bubble.

Groups of people in bubbles.

Tits are so weird.

I am so wired.

There was another.

A Souless Apparition.

Sex and Laughter

Light a Fire by the Roadside

wait and see who stops to listen

skeletons in the closet


Alterior Motives

Hidden Agendas

The Inpenetrable Barrier

An Impregnable fortress

Keep Your Finger on the Pulse

Choosing Icons

These are the folk I'm endebted to impress

Never Heard

The ONLY place to pee!

The bottom of the food chain.

Healthy wealthy and sane!

Ultraviolent

Wolf Knife

Knife Wear

The rainbow connection by Kermit the frog.

Mom and the Cougars

Ahh!! Agh!! What was I thinking!! Great names, titles.

The wear on the blade, cuts made and the razor dulls.

What was I thinking?!

Four titles in the body of a Headline.

That makes two parents I'm satisfied having known. There's no need to elaborate. The mean has reached a significant level of unacceptable treatment. I can see no redeeming quality in our toxic relationship. Goodbye.

.88mm

What am I looking for? It seems those half moons, nibs, and the rest of the gang are catching up with me.

Redeeming Qualities

Humouring requests: Why not just go through with them? How will the consequences make me feel?

I'm going to go to the library now, and study RDA until the evening.

I bought a coffee.

Could the cure for sadness be humour? Yes, it likely is.

There's nothing cooler than leftover homework.

I killed the battery to my laptop. Some good advice from a friend: add violin and flute.


I can't put 800$ on my VISA this month, not yet anyway. The minimum payment is something like 52$ and is due April 14th. I took out my rent which left me with 577$, more than I had anticipated. I have about 113$ in my CIBC account. What I'll do is put 100$ on the VISA and beef it up if I get a loan cheque.

Nuggets and fries for supper, classic. I've decided to get my graduation photos done, that'll put another 200$ on my VISA (at least). Still, after the 2400$ I dropped on it last month I should be fine. I can't imagine spending that much without a real good reason. I think my budget to date (before the 180$ grocery bill I slammed down last week) was less than 200$. Ha! Nope, I just checked my statement. I've put over 3000$ on it so far this year. I was right about my minimum payment. The due date is April 13th however. Anyway, I'll put 100$ on it from my RBC account right now. If I'm still under 4000$ by the time I'm working full time for the summer I'll be pretty happy. I think that's reasonable, it gives  me 1200$ to work with. I put 117.82$ on the VISA, which means I have this month and next month to make June's rent.

Rubber Stamp

Oh yeah, I'm cooking frozen vegetables too. I overcooked them.

Caloused ear drums blistered over.

Always on the outside looing for a way in.

I was going to shoot some web cam video! Oh well, there's always tomorrow.